that's what she said

a good read

2011-10-05T20:29:00.000-04:00

i was browsing a magazine and ran across this quote. it is from the author's latest book, Hope Will Find You.

We live in a broken world. Inside us there beats a heart that has been broken more times than we'd care to remember. But there will always be someone to help us pick up the shattered pieces and begin the process of repair. Sometimes with glue, sometimes with love, sometimes with miracles. Always with God. ~ Rabbi Naomi Levy

i am grateful for those who have helped pick up the pieces and loved me back together again.

simplification: step three

2011-10-01T21:23:00.001-04:00

one thing i have found, which surprises me, is that if i make time for myself in the day, i find time for everything else. i have reached the conclusion that this phenomena is a consequence of proper priorities. let's face it: if i haven't had a coffee or a shower, if i am distracted and frazzled, if i'm flying by the seat of my pants for everything from laundry to dinner, then i can hardly be the kind of mother, wife, and friend that i want to be for others.

life can begin to follow a simpler tune when i carve out time for personal Bible study and exercise. i don't get this right by any stretch of the imagination. my goal is to do this by waking up an hour earlier than the rest of my household. i am snickering as i type because this is not what i achieve! Nevertheless, it is my aspiration.

in pursuit of this aspiration, i am moving my wake-up time up by 15 minutes per week until i'm at the hour. next week, the alarm will be set for 6:45am.

i want to have time to calm my mind and my spirit for the day. iwant to commune with my God and understand how i am supposed to live the day that lies before me. i want to present enough to make a choice for happiness in my day. i want to exercise and feel the tingle of energy in my muscles, to feel the soothing stretch of my arms and back, to breathe deeply in and out in meditation. i want to choose to lie in the cool morning listening to the sounds of my sleeping household on a lazy Saturday morning, without "there's no milk for breakfast" nagging at the back of my mind.

the key to accomplishing this on some semblance of a regular basis, is to put it on the calendar from the get-go. and, don't let go of it even if i fail to do it one week. it takes a lot of positive self-talk: this is important, i'm a better person when i'm rested and centered, i need this and my family needs this from me, i can care for myself. even if i don't believe all of this, just saying it leads me to believe it. then, taking the time for myself becomes easier.

selfish? no. i find that i am more likely to neglect my well-being rather than be selfish about it. if you're one of those who do the same, perhaps it's time to savor an hour to yourself tonight!

2011-03-23T21:20:00.003-04:00

truth
is, i ache.
chronic, always at the back of my mind
settling for having less than i want
because you are gone.
be
it day or night, never matter
perfume advertisement, worn pajama
the skirt i never wear waiting in
the closet. he
told
me it would stay.
times between filled to brimming
a laundry list of life
you never had.

© Amy Feistel 2011

simplification: step two

2011-03-14T23:09:00.003-04:00

simplifying one's life isn't really a "do it once and it's done" kind of project. it is genuinely an ongoing process, which makes it more of a lifestyle. the second step i have taken is reevaluating my friendships and other relationships. it is very easy to claim friendships with individuals whom we barely know and, before long, our lives are as cluttered with relationships as our closets are of junk.

what is friendship? who are my friends?

the digital, network environment has taken relationships to a new level. now, i receive friendship requests from strangers and i nurture a digital persona based on the particular environment i happen to be participating at the moment. need an example? i put my best professional foot forward on LinkedIn where, I might add, the site reminds me that "Relationships Matter". i maintain a virtual resume with deliberation and network with connections by frenetically responding to and sending linking invitations. then, i click over to Facebook and notate my day in witty repartee with the status updates for 500 of my nearest and dearest. for real?!

the intellectual discussions of virtual networking, user interfaces, sociological constructs of community and virtual self are fascinating to me. i don't have the time or energy to have that conversation here (i must finish this post before Little A's nap ends). want to talk about it? post a comment or call me or bring up the topic when you see me next. i look forward to it! in the meantime...

i decided that i needed technology to help me manage clutter rather than create more. and, i want my digital persona to accurately reflect my flesh and bone. i want to have an integrated life rather than one that is compartmentalized. i want the self working from home to mesh with the one who is mommy and the one who wife, daughter, girlfriend, sister, musician, sunday school teacher and racer.

a quick internet look-up gives me this definition of friendship.
–noun
1. a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.
2. a person who gives assistance; patron; supporter.
3. a person who is on good terms with another; a person who is not hostile.
4. a member of the same nation, party, etc.
5. (initial capital letter) a member of the Religious Society of Friends; a
Quaker.
–verb (used with object)
6. Rare . to befriend.
—idiom
7. make friends with, to enter into friendly relations with; become a friend
to.
—synonyms
1. comrade, chum, crony, confidant. See acquaintance.
2. backer, advocate.
4. ally, associate, confrere, compatriot.
—antonyms
1, 4. enemy, foe.

who are my friends? with whom do i feel attached by affection? to whom would i offer assistance? am i really an advocate for them?

i decided to address these questions in one social network only. i chose Facebook. here, i removed "friend clutter". it took two days and wasn't very scientific. i reviewed the entire list of people twice and i "un-friended" the complete strangers, acquaintances, and those with whom i have not nor plan to communicate. who is left? only the people that i intend to truly keep in touch with and be a friend to are now connected to me. this isn't to say that i didn't like the other people. i, simply, cannot truly be friends with everyone.

i want to visit this network and really have time to interact with friends there rather than avoid it because i'm overwhelmed by the status updates or the game invitations. in writing about it with a friend, i was reminded that my commitments to my friends will be stronger now because there are fewer of them. i'm saying "no" so that my "yes" will be deliberative and meaningful in the future.

now, i have to give thought to friendship requests that are sent each day in order to maintain it. still, my soul feels lightened, freer to enjoy the pictures of friends and family. being truthful and sincere with myself has made me happier.

simplification: step one

2011-03-14T22:50:00.006-04:00

i have been living in a self-induced haze of emails, forums, facebook posts, text messages, phone calls, rss feeds and other variations of technology we call "communication". the tower has reached the clouds and i'm too weary to climb higher. i need the clouds to disappear or the tower needs to be "amy sized". Option two is realistic, don't you think?!

thus begins my journey to simplification. i have the need for a hub--a central place of being (more on this in another post)--and bringing my life down to a smaller scale meets this need with something more than a panacea. mind you, i don't have a real plan that was created in a secret, underground room to be launched on a particular day. i sense what needs to be done in the moment and i go with it. i don't look back, plodding steadily forward to clarity.

step one: ‎remove myself from all mailing lists that are not absolutely essential.
this is tough. i enjoy the little emails i get throughout the week with this or that update regarding some fabric shop or a new recipe. i like the idea of being in a discussion about politics with my friends from church. i like to feel connected to the world when i read my newspaper digest. i do not like guilt that accompanies emails virtually piling up because i cannot find the time to read my one poem a day. i am annoyed by the notifications of someone wanting to be my "friend" on a networking site. i'm not saying all mailing lists are a bother or need to be abandoned. there are some regular emails that i want to keep receiving. for example: i need the weekly email on babies/moms with great game ideas. there are days when i am too tired to think of a new activity and this email is a life-saver. i need the daily calendar reminders that i email to myself. i would lose my head and never be on time otherwise. i want to be connected to the world outside my minuscule acreage here at home so i need the news digested in a palatable format for a busy woman.

i don't need emails that drain the life from me. the buy-this-now-such-a-great-deal emails engender desire (read: greed) that can be unhealthy and unwise. other emails merely make my hands tired from clicking the mouse to delete them. i don't need left-over mailings from my university work days. these are the kinds of emails that i am weeding out and, slowly, removing my address from the mailing lists.

step one takes time. i'm still working on this step. each day, i open and review the emails i am receiving. the goal is to look at each of these only once and make a decision about it's future at that moment. a time sucker? click on the "unsubscribe" button at the bottom of the page. a keeper? filter it into a designated folder for reference. a maybe? decide then and there, in a split-second, what to do with it. don't let it linger in the inbox awaiting a papal dispensation. just save it or dump it.

having worked on this only minutes ago, i am mentally exhausted. i am also happily going to sleep with fewer emails in my inbox and many more that will not show up tomorrow morning!

it's late here. time for a bit of relaxation and sleep. step two will have to wait until another day.

Rainy Day Comforts

2011-02-13T21:50:00.001-05:00

Rainy Day Comforts by visionaryidyllic featuring printed umbrellas

This set was created in a Mini Editor on brocantehome.net

Birds of a Feather

2011-02-13T21:25:00.001-05:00

Birds of a Feather by visionaryidyllic featuring feather hair accessories

This set was created in a Mini Editor on brocantehome.net/blog/2011/02/brocante-playground

prayer

2010-11-08T19:48:00.003-05:00

i was spending time on that ubiquitous entity, facebook, when i read this status update from a friend:

"Prayer is preoccupation with our needs: God help .. God protect .. God heal.
Praise is preoccupation with our blessings: Thank You for...
Worship is preoccupation with God alone, regardless of our circumstances.
Today I will remember I owe Him not only my worship, but everything."

for many reasons, this quip irritated me. it sounds exactly like those feel good statements i've heard in churches the world over -- statements that make you all warm and fuzzy but leave you empty and dry as a brown paper bag.

prayer need not be a preoccupation of needs if the Lord's Prayer is rightfully applied as a guide.

Our Father, who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on Earth as it is in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. Forgive us our debts [trespasses] as we forgive our debtors [those who trespass against us]. Lead us not into temptation; but, deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.

the first six phrases are in contemplation of the place God rightfully holds in this world. the final six phrases are a confession of our total dependence on Him. to speak it aloud communally, to whisper it privately, to simply hold this prayer in our hearts is worship.

when my sister died suddenly nearly six and a half years ago, prayer was transformed for me. at word of her drowning accident, i could do nothing more than kneel alone in my living room, arms stretched out before me, pleading with God to save her. i do not know if i spoke more than i screamed and sobbed, "dear God, no. please. no."

many hours later, words and tears had left. i was numb and emptied. i remember very little from those hours and days due to the stupor of grief. yet, i recall stepping out onto the porch and feeling a slight breeze on my face and neck. the words of this prayer came to my heart and mind. and so, i whispered it. i dreamed it. i thought it. through every subsequent wrenching moment of grief, this prayer prayed for me. truly God knows what is in our hearts for He understood my prayer of muddled recitation.

indeed, his kingdom has come to me through my community of friends. i trust his will has been done though i know not the reason. He has given me what i needed to live each day; particularly through a dear friend who weekly took me out for lunch to gently nurture me back from my grief into life without my sister. He has forgiven my doubts and fears, showing grace that i didn't previously imagine possible. He dropped mercy on family relationships that were wounded but have now been healed. i have learned to trust his leading and know that He means good for my life. amen.

camping day three, etc.

2010-07-26T22:20:00.004-04:00

if you haven't noticed yet, the camping days blurred into one week of adventure!

little a and i finally sorted out a good showering/bathing method: she bathed in the plastic bin while i showered.

i learned that i must start a fire at 2pm if we were to eat at any kind of reasonable hour and either get ourselves to a meeting or have time to enjoy the evening.

wine can be perfectly paired with roasted marshmallows.

little a was a snuggle bug each morning and redeemed many a frustrating moment with her cute smile.

my attempt at keeping food in a cooler was an utter failure. i will always shop daily on future camping trips. it's simpler.

we made some lovely new friends: claude, ruby and cody the black lab have a lovely home and a garden that filled me with all sorts of flowery dreams and a delicious veggie salad. mmmm... yummy!

as lovely as a rustic cabin and a nightly campfire can be, i really needed the bit of city offered to me by Ottawa. we spent an entire afternoon wandering around Byward Market. had dinner at a new little Irish pub, The Druid. shopped a bit and felt quite cosmopolitan.

Canton has it's own bit of heaven in the BlackBird Cafe, which is where we met up with alex, martin and victor. little a adores victor and, i think, he's quite taken with her, too! i always enjoy seeing these old friends. in fact, this little side trip to visit with them has become something of a tradition!

we worked, too. don't think this was all play and no work! we measured stages and transits. we checked out possible stage roads with logan. we went to meetings. we networked and sold advertising. whew!

our final drive took us south through the Adirondack Park. we stayed overnight in the cutest, little cabin outfitted in the quaintest of 1950's furniture and decor at Park Motel. take a look here and you'll see a picture: scroll down to "front cabins". ours was the small one on the right. cute, right?!

we were pampered by lisa in Rockland County, NY. she treated little a to a baby ice cream cone. she treated amy to dinner and entertained with newsy stories.

all in all, it was lovely. i can't wait until next time!

camping trip day two

2010-07-26T22:11:00.003-04:00

the little girl and i arrived at our camping site with what i anticipated being plenty of time to unpack the car, set up our cozy home for the next week, and prepare our first, delicious camp dinner.

boy, howdy, was i wrong!

i did not know that it took so very long for coals to become hot enough to cook even a small can of beans. it was nearly nine o'clock before we were hungrily scarfing down our dinner. there was no time for a bath -- it was simply too much time past the little girl's bed-time -- and i had to leave the dishes in a bin to sit overnight because it was too dark to see to wash them up!

i was a bit nervous and worried and worn-out. i left the door open to let in the cool night air, booby-trapped the entry with little a's toys and, cautiously, went to sleep.

camping trip day one

2010-07-15T08:42:00.003-04:00

i have to be in upstate ny to work on the Black River Stages rally. each time i travel up there, i try to stay at a different location. it helps me get to know new people and gives me a perspective from which to recommend locations to my volunteers and competitors.

this year, i rented a cabin at the Adirondack Thousand Island Campground. the cabin is large enough to house a full size bed and a bunk bed. two windows and the door create a cross breeze. there's a drop down shelf under one of the windows. the porch is deep and shady. and, it's perfectly nestled in a clearing under some gorgeous shade trees.

little a is with me and we are making a grand time of her first camping trip.

that is... after a rough start.

it took us half a day to get out of town. i needed the rally computer and it took a trip to the shop, a full on search in storage, a return to the house, a heated discussion, a search of the garage and the house (again) to discover the rally computer was sitting in plain sight on the desk all along. *sigh* so much for my search methods! anders was a huge help in packing all our gear into the car.

we drove to d.c. and stopped at ikea to meet up with rachel. she was visiting friends and doing a bit of shopping. we tagged along and had dinner with her. it was a nice break from the driving. i haven't seen rachel in 3 years (?). talking on the phone is just not a good substitute for a real hug!

little a was worn out from playing "patty cake" with auntie rachel and promptly went to sleep when we hit the road again. i drove through d.c. -- i love seeing the monuments and buildings lit up at night. we finally stopped just east of baltimore. the hotel happened to be one that anders and i have visited previously. this time around, i noticed updated paint -- the hotel has been painted to look like a swiss chalet. their attempts at quaintness are more amusing than anything else; but, they get bonus points for brightly painted flowers in painted window boxes!

in the lobby we were greeted by sounds of world cup soccer. when i asked the score of the (clearly) europeans at the table, they wanted to know if i meant the red sox. seriously?! since the score was still zero all and it was late, i just offered a "go oranje!" and little a and i trotted off to snooze.

my life.

2010-07-07T21:52:00.003-04:00

childhood ambition: to be an attorney

fondest memory: i am fond of my earliest memory -- i was four years old and visiting my aunt Janice's house for Christmas. Janice made a doll for me that had yellow hair, blue eyes, and a pink dress. my grandfather made sugar cookies and decorated one of them to look like the face of my doll. i remember eating a cookie with him early on Christmas morning. i wrote a poem about this memory... i'll have to dig it out of the archives.

soundtrack: varies. lately it has been classical.

wildest dream: i'd really rather not elaborate. it was ghastly and traumatic. i do have a recurring dream that haunts me when i'm sick with a fever. i remember having this fever-dream when i was a child of six or seven.

proudest moment: seeing Anders at the end of the chapel aisle on our wedding day.

biggest challenge: accepting less than perfection.

alarm clock: little a. she wakes me each and every morning with a smile.

perfect day: i'm learning to accept less than perfect days. i look for one or two really wonderful occurrences in each day. it's amazing that each day has a few to recall over dinner.

first job: at a tea shop in Taichung, Taiwan.

indulgence: fresh, organic, free-trade coffee beans ground for my morning coffee. 60% dark (or more) chocolate.

last purchase: milk.

favorite movie: The World's Fastest Indian, and White Christmas.

inspiration: joy.

vintage housekeeping

2010-07-01T22:45:00.005-04:00

thanks to my dear mother, i have always been a rather meticulous housekeeper. (i took a great amount of pleasure in polishing the silver for our holiday dinners at the young age of twelve.) housekeeping, though, became drudgery for many years; particularly, those years at the university when all i really wanted to do was sleep, study and have a good time with friends.

years have passed and i have returned to my home with renewed interest. learning to cook gluten-free inspired forays into gourmet cooking and i couldn't very well whip up deliciousness in a messy kitchen now, could i? planning for a sweet babba in the house meant organizing every nook and cranny while i had the energy for sorting. paint in lovely, brilliant colors flew around like a hummingbird.

behind it all was a dash of inspiration from Brocante Home -- a lovely site dedicated to perking up those of us who weary of being tidy all the damn time. i have a cleaning routine that leaves my hands soft and my heart light. i indulge in puttery treats that thrill my romantic soul. and i reward myself every day by having a bit of coffee or chocolate or a short read when a little chore is done.

it might be silly. it might be terrible vintage. but it is ever so much fun and i love it.

favorite words

2010-04-08T20:35:00.002-04:00

i've been inspired by Alison at Brocante Home to dwell on a few of my favorite words.

i have a fun list of words that are posted on my computer monitor. my intent is to think, ruminate, dream on these words... and watch as i grow into them. here's a sampling:

tender-hearted
spontaneous
sweet-tempered
sassy
charming
gentle
plucky
delicate
darling
gracious
alluring
irresistible
rapturous
bewitching
enchanting
spirited
soft
daring
clever
chic
loving

there are other words that have a wonderful feel as they roll off my tongue.
chartreuse, ephemeral, peony, silken, daughter, sepia, carve, olive, shenanigan, grace, wanderlust, chivalry, cloche, whisper, ecstasy.

creating a bookworm

2010-03-29T08:50:00.003-04:00

i have always loved reading. according to my mother, my favorite childhood book was Barney Beagle. she read it over and over to me. i think i still have it floating around my daughter's nursery now.

it seems perfectly natural to me to want to read to my baby. at five months old, she is beginning to enjoy the pictures and is reaching to touch the words. but, i read to her during sleepless nights when she was two and three weeks old. it soothed me and the rhythms of word and voice seemed to soothe her.

recently, we went on our first library visit. we were in Tennessee for work and i needed a place to take her that wasn't a) the car or b) the hotel. the perry county library in Lobelville was perfect. we sat in the children's section. i sat on one of the little chairs (it was nearly exactly amy-size) and held her in my lap. i read to her. lots of books though i don't remember the titles now. then, when she was wiggly, i let her lay on a blanket on the floor while i sat next to her and read some more.

the librarians were tickled pink and marked down the books i read. (this helps with their circulation numbers.)

it was a lovely way to spend an hour or two. i'm sure we'll do it again soon!

life with little girl

2010-02-25T20:39:00.003-05:00

is sweet

strawberry curls and blueberry eyes
with a wingspan of happiness
each time we say hello

short sweet hours of sleep
vivid dreams of light, color, sound
hints of smiles
turn to belly chuckles

rockabye stars
in night light glow
pink kisses 'til morning

© 2010 Amy Feistel

my village

2009-11-19T14:51:00.003-05:00

they say it takes a village to raise a child. i better understand this quote since my daughter's arrival.

two weeks ago, my friends threw a hello-baby party and gave me some advice. i'm recapping it here for you... you never know when it might come in handy!

- you don't have to scrub 'em everyday. a little dirt is fine.
- sing to her.
- never wake a sleeping baby.
- whatever stage your child is in, it will pass. enjoy it or know it will soon be over.
- take your baby to the nursery on occasion.
- take all opportunities to hold your baby. don't let that moment pass.
- your baby will do best on plain old tuesdays... don't rush, slow down.
- ask God to fill in the blanks when you don't have the answers.
- rub your baby's tummy in a clockwise motion to soothe an upset tummy.
- remember: it gets better and it gets worse.
- enjoy every moment. cuddle your baby when she is sleeping.
- don't buy into the stereotypes ("terrible twos" etc).
- smell your baby's hair as often as you can. take in all the good smells of a baby.
- write down the cute things your baby says. you won't remember them later.
- plan to fail.

indeed, i have a village. thank you, dear ones, for the advice, love and joy of friendship!

consumption & faith

2009-08-18T12:59:00.002-04:00

periodically, this topic comes up for pondering. this time the trigger was a market report about consumers' "wants" being converted to "needs". the prime example was hd television. what used to be a "want" is now being perceived (and acted upon) as a "need", despite job loss and the poor economy. then, my friend, Aaron wrote a note that really started the conversation for me again. i talked with another friend the following day about the same issue.

if you call yourself a Christian, which i do, then there are inherent conflicts with consumption and living a Christ-like life. i see it in those around me and i find it (disturbingly) in myself. needless consumption is hard core sin but many are willing to sit by, be satisfied with their weekly tithe and service attendance, and never acknowledge the conflict of interest. questioning consumption is a tough task because it's pervasive and most are ignorant of their own drowning in it...

my friend, Margot, addresses her own consumption in ways that scare me. such as, not purchasing a single item of clothing for herself this year. and, having her husband cut her (cute) hair. her bold actions to curb her own and her family's consumption challenge me.

it really is a decision that should be individual and spiritual. i cannot determine for someone else what is a need or want. the issue i see at hand is that we are not honest with ourselves. the distinction we need to re-learn is that between sufficiency and excess. as my pastor said this weekend, not having what is sufficient is poverty; and, excess is largely a consequence of greed and lack of generosity.

most people know the adage (and Scripture) about storing up treasures in heaven instead of on earth. i don't really think of my values in terms of storing treasure on earth vs heaven. it seems to me that the entire idea of "storing up" is still driven by a desire for more, which i equate with greed. if i am only "generous" because i believe that it will get me some benefit in heaven, then i'm not really being generous and i'm still seeking to preserve my own interests. the problem with even Christian perspectives on consumption is that we are imperfect and our personal interests will always be at work, even if it means shaping our theology to bring us out on the "better" or "good" side.

ultimately, I believe the big questions for myself are: am I caring about my "neighbor" as much as I care about myself? how much do I need (what is sufficient)? how will I know when I have excess?

wordle

2009-04-08T20:54:00.004-04:00

Fun with words. Thanks to the Fascinating Woman for the link and to wordle.net for the analysis and graphic.

For a larger view, go here.

expectations

2009-04-02T15:02:00.002-04:00

anders and i are filled with expectation.
we are to have a baby in october and our little one is rapidly growing as i type.

expectations are difficult for me. i'm the type to like a plan, know what i'm getting into and not have surprises. i have high expectations for myself (in every category from grant-writing to house-keeping). unfortunately, this new path is fraught with many twists, turns and unknowns.

anders, on the other hand, loves the adventure of the next exciting thing that might happen to us.

silly as it is, we're learning a bit from each other in this... i'm planning here and there. we plan to know the sex of our baby-to-be. and, we're leaving some of the path unexplored until later, when the time is right or when the decision cannot be kept at bay, or when it just comes to us in an moment of inspiration.

we are thrilled and hesitant. holding our breath and exhilarated all at once.

Because of Louis

2009-02-14T13:13:00.002-05:00

give me
trumpet's sweet talk
my belly against you
five fingers of your hand
curved to my back
step to step in
cigar smoke and red wine

give me
harmonica words
your chin pressing my cheek
or lashes crushed as I rest
head against chest
step to step in
whispers with each measure

give me
dark voice scatting
misty breath on my neck
damp curls brushing your lips

© 1998 Amy Feistel

music

2009-01-21T14:33:00.002-05:00

music has always been at the heart of my spirituality. i first learned to play the piano at age five, taught by my mother. i later would learn to play the violin. i still play both but less of the piano since i no longer own one of my own.

even without the daily routine of practice, music fills my life. i have fond memories of my sister's flute and sadder moments when my brothers paid tribute with their trumpets in taps.

when i sit in church, it is often through music that i hear God speak to me. however, this doesn't just happen in the pew on a sunday morning.

this week it happened on a beautiful snowy day as i listened to music on the television. this musical moment brought my heart closer to heaven. it was when a quartet of musicians played john williams' rendition of the lovely Shaker hymn, "Simple Gifts."

performed by cellist yo-yo ma and violinist itzhak perlman, anthony mcgill on clarinet and pianist gabriela montero.

the inaugural rendition has already been posted to YouTube if anyone missed it earlier.

"Simple Gifts" was written by elder joseph while he was at the Shaker community in alfred, maine in 1848. These are the lyrics to his one-verse song:

'Tis the gift to be simple, 'tis the gift to be free,
'Tis the gift to come down where you ought to be,
And when we find ourselves in the place just right,
'Twill be in the valley of love and delight.
When true simplicity is gain'd,
To bow and to bend we shan't be asham'd,
To turn, turn will be our delight,
Till by turning, turning we come round right.

Are You a Jackie or a Marilyn? Or Someone Else? Mad Men-era Female Icon Quiz ...

2009-01-08T15:24:00.003-05:00

i found a cute quiz on another blog and couldn't resist doing it myself. silly but amazingly accurate!

You are a Bette -- "I must be strong"

Bettes are direct, self-reliant, self-confident, and protective.

How to Get Along with Me
* * Stand up for yourself... and me. (i'll do the same for you.)
* * Be confident, strong, and direct. (i can take the punches with the kisses.)
* * Don't gossip about me or betray my trust. (trust is everything.)
* * Be vulnerable and share your feelings. See and acknowledge my tender, vulnerable side. (i might sound gruff and stoic but i really am a softie.)
* * Give me space to be alone. (i need breathing space every so often.)
* * Acknowledge the contributions I make, but don't flatter me. (if you do flatter, i'll probably laugh it off.)
* * I often speak in an assertive way. Don't automatically assume it's a personal attack. (passionate discourse energizes me!)
* * When I scream, curse, and stomp around, try to remember that's just the way I am. (and, i'll try to remember to throw my tantrum in a very cute, girlish way.)

What I Like About Being a Bette

* * being independent and self-reliant (thanks to my papa)
* * being able to take charge and meet challenges head on (i'll have none of this sitting on our hands business...)
* * being courageous, straightforward, and honest
* * getting all the enjoyment I can out of life (hurray!)
* * supporting, empowering, and protecting those close to me (even if you're a bit stuck in the mud or doing it all wrong)
* * upholding just causes

What's Hard About Being a Bette

* * overwhelming people with my bluntness; scaring them away when I don't intend it (this happens more often than you'd think)
* * being restless and impatient with others' incompetence i also get restless with furniture arrangements. i push my chairs and plants around for a new configuration every few months or so.)
* * sticking my neck out for people and receiving no appreciation for it
* * never forgetting injuries or injustices (i really do try to forget!)
* * putting too much pressure on myself (can you say perfectionist?)
* * getting high blood pressure when people don't obey the rules or when things don't go right (fortunately, my dear husband is teaching me more about letting go of rules and plans)

Bettes as Children Often

* * are independent; have an inner strength and a fighting spirit (i didn't like this when i was young but that strength and spirit come in handy as an adult!)
* * are sometimes loners (you could always find me curled up in a corner with a good book!)
* * seize control so they won't be controlled
* * figure out others' weaknesses
* * attack verbally or physically when provoked (i did warn that kid before i punched him in the nose!)
* * take charge in the family because they perceive themselves as the strongest, or grow up in difficult surroundings

You, of course, can try your hand at this silly quiz, too.

thankfulness

2008-11-28T16:12:00.002-05:00

this year, i am thankful for many gifts.

my heart is full of thanks for my husband, anders. he laughs at my silly jokes. his constancy has held me firmly as an anchor. he is watchful for my illness and protects me. he pushes me to grow beyond my imagined limits and congratulates me on my successes.

i am grateful for the simple pleasure of working every day on projects that I love. imagine - i have found a sport that satisfies my every energetic impulse and passionate nature! within, i have discovered intellectual and professional challenges that i thrill to experience. i have also found lasting friendships among my fellow sportsmen and women.

i traveled a lot this year and i'm thankful for the memories of a Nevada desert in full bloom (yeah, with flowers everywhere!) and a crying loon on a New York lake.

i thank God that i have two new sisters and the heart to appreciate their friendship because i have loved and lost a sister in years past. each will bring a new baby into our lives this year and i anticipate their gifts eagerly.

i am thankful for the well-being and safety of my sister, nancy. she travels far each day to care for those in need of intense medical care. she fulfills her duties from a heart of compassion and generosity.

i am thankful for my brothers. in their own way, they are each strong leaders. one quietly serving in a school that reaches out to young women already lost in the murky darkness of our society. one serving his country thousands of miles from home. in them, i see the nobleness of our father and my heart swells with pride.

i am thankful for my mother. i understand her more clearly as i grow older. there is more agreeableness in our relationship and the moments in which we share more of ourselves with each other are dear.

i give thanks for little pleasures such as...
an old dog who still trots around at dinner time as though he's only a puppy
wine, chocolate, savory little dishes, fresh fruit and all other gastronomic joys
fitting into my size six clothes again
little jars of nail polish with outrageous names that make me laugh when i do my nails
a well-maintained roof over my head and a luxurious new bed in which to fall asleep each night

... and much, much more.

baking

2008-11-25T22:43:00.003-05:00

i have always been a cook. i remember making my first salad and spaghetti dinner sometime during my 8th year of life.

thanks to my mother, i learned to cook from scratch, which is a rare skill these days. i have been doubly blessed by this skill -- celiac disease requires a gluten-free diet and this is achieved most easily by cooking my food myself, limiting processed foods, and eating lots of fresh vegetables and meat.

okay, no excuses (even good celiac disease ones). i admit it. i'm a foodie.

i have four years worth of a cooking magazine (for reference and recipes). i have three shelves of cookbooks that i read for fun and a few other about-food books, too.

a friend asked me today what was my cooking specialty. hmmm... entrees, i think. i thoroughly enjoy cooking up a delightful set of dishes for my husband and i to eat for dinner. i'm not so good at dessert. especially since i've started cooking gluten free. it took me four or five years of holiday baking to achieve a suitable pie crust that was sufficiently resilient as dough and flaky when baked.

i have never attempted a gluten-free cake until this week. a few nights ago i got it into my brain that i was going to bake a cake. so, i scoured the cabinets for ingredients while referencing a baking cook book. i settled on a sponge cake. i have delightful childhood memories of light sponge cake layers partnered with jam. and this is what i wanted.

the cake was gorgeous. granted, due to the heavier gluten-free flours, it didn't rise the appropriate four to five inches. it did rise two inches and it was sponge-ey with a light, moist bite. i topped it with blackberry jam and each morsel was heavenly. so much so that my husband and i devoured it in three days. i noticed that he snagged a few extra bites as he waltzed through the kitchen after work.

yummy! i wish i had taken a picture. maybe next time. tonight i baked a pumpkin pie. i'm enjoying my little foray into a new side of cooking. i hope you're inspired to do something new, too.

what do i do?

2008-11-24T18:05:00.003-05:00

according to this NYT post, happy people are busy people who do a lot of things except watch television. this interesting little article was pointed out to me by the dear author of the Brocante Home Chronicles. she proceeds to detail all the happy things she will do to lighten her dreary winter.

i like the idea. and we have already established the fact that i like lists.

here's what i've done this week (and it's only monday) to cheer up or exhibit my new found happy lease on life:

i baked a gluten-free sponge cake, topped it with local blackberry jam and ate a deliciously big piece of it for dessert.
i scrubbed my house top to bottom for the holidays. i did it in advance so i won't be completely stressed out on thursday.
i took the dog to the vet in his very cute argyle christmas sweater.
i indulged in a glass of eggnog and rum.
i turned on the little electric window candles so my house glows in the deepening dusk of five o'clock.
i lit a basil and rosemary scented candle and let it burn all day, filling the house with it's scent.

***

i'm not really sure which comes first, the happiness or the fun of the activities.
either way, it's a great start to the week.

so, expect to feel a bit bah-hum-bug in the next few weeks. after all, 'tis the season. a movie or two (i can think of a few holiday favorites) will never hurt.

just don't forget to do happy things. glowing on a dark night can cheer you right up if you weren't already feeling bubbly. candles soothe and warm when the days are cold and overcast. little dogs (or kittens) wag their tails and everyone smiles.

lists

2008-11-20T11:50:00.017-05:00

so, if you don't already know me well, i'll share a bit of trivia with you.

i'm a list person. i adore most lists.
i have a list for chores, groceries, work tasks, house repairs, and even this sentence!

i do not like lists that are too long. i feel overwhelmed by long lists.

i received a challenge to write a christmas list.
now, i don't recall if i ever have made a list of christmas wishes, even as a child. i'd have to ask my mother...

so, i feel rather un-practiced about this.
i may add to this list as time goes by or i may update it with fun "my wish came true" news.
who knows (?!) where it will take me.

amy's x-mas list

warm, fuzzy black gloves that look a bit more cozy than elegant
3x5 hard bound moleskine lined notebook for jotting down thoughts
fun socks in bright colors
feathered chickadee-dee birdie for my holiday tree
thick bathrobe that keeps me warm on cool mornings
dangling earrings that look like they were made in heaven - light and sparkling
melt-in-my-mouth chocolate covered cherries
card game, perhaps Rook, which I still do not own
wooden-handled spatula for mixing up gluten-free baking

silliness

2008-11-10T13:04:00.002-05:00

first, an introduction.

Tico is my 7 lb. black and white chihuahua. he looks like a dairy cow but thinks he's the biggest dog in the neighborhood. he is not terribly observant of cats who try to sniff him but he does watch the fence to make sure zoe and claire (the neighbor's dogs) cannot get to him.

he successfully gained authority of pauli, my brother's 75 lb. german shepherd, when pauli visited us last year. they are now friends.

on the other hand, betsy, pauli's sister and a 90 lb blood hound, thinks tico is a toy so he must regularly nip her in the nose to get his point across.

Tico is a bit spoiled. no, i do not dress him up and i do not carry him around in a prada bag. he just gets to sleep pretty much anywhere he chooses and he gets a treat when he goes outdoors.

today tico decided that it was not enough to sleep on the guest bed in my office, under a blanket no less. no, he had to sleep in my lap with his head resting on my arm while i'm trying to type. if my arm moves too much, he looks at me like i'm making him the most uncomfortable dog in the world.

silly dog. i adore him.

happiness

2008-10-24T17:26:00.001-04:00

i've been thinking a lot about happiness lately, as it primarily relates to inner happiness rather than any type of externally motivated, temporary glee. to be entirely honest, i've been working on developing true inner joy -- the kind that derives from a serious understanding and acceptance of self.

i've also been thinking about the things that make me happy. things that give me that little momentary giggle or perk that i need to start my day or jump start me out of a grouchy mood. things like hot coffee, a cute chihuahua, anticipation of a yummy bit of dining, a nice email from a friend, and the color orange.

i love the color orange. not the neon-ish color that is sometimes popular but shades of pumpkin, rust, mesa sunrise, tangerine, and any other shades that merge with red and yellow. i adore this color so much that in 2004, i painted my bedroom in the most lovely shade of it.

i have had many a person laugh when they discover my husband and i have an orange bedroom. he doesn't seem to mind, though. and this color makes me happy. it makes me feel warm and cozy. at night it calms me and in the mornings it energizes me.

so i've been thinking about why i love this color so much. i never wore it as a child (at least not that i can remember). i did, however, own a big orange dog.

the story of the big orange dog: i am named after my father's friend, Lanney. my middle name is Lannette (with the same “a” as “apple”). and Lanney gave me a big orange dog when i was only weeks old. there is a picture of me lying in my crib with a dog that is easily 2x as big as me sitting in the corner. i am on my stomach, my head is lifted to see the orange dog and i'm grinning like there's no tomorrow.

i still have that big orange dog tucked away in the attic. i love that dog and now, i know why i love that gorgeous color!

the soup

2008-10-14T22:22:00.003-04:00

i just had the most lovely weekend with a dear friend in Georgia.

she learned to paint this weekend (her study) and i learned how to be a bit less in-charge and bossy. we both did a fantastic job of it!

still, she managed to get covered in paint.

imagine this...

day one.
"ooohhhhhh. i stepped in the soup!" she says.
dismayed, i turn to find her foot dripping bavarian torte.
bucket and cloth in hand, i gently clean her foot until it is mostly dry and
smeary with latex.

day two.
an agonizing "oooohhhh" followed by "i stepped in the soup, again!"
this time, i laugh and remove everything from said foot's reach
before cleaning du jour from her dainty toes.

i am still giggling over it! silly girl!

the good ol' days

2008-09-04T20:25:00.002-04:00

I found this little quiz on a random site.

as a 1930s wife, i am
just average

take the test and see how you score!

wonder woman years

2008-08-29T22:31:00.003-04:00

a dear girlfriend posted a picture today of herself in wonder woman underwear. it made me remember having my own set of super heroine gear.

i loved wonder woman — i was going to be just like her and i wore my underwear proudly to prove it.

my little sister sue had super woman undies and because of her blonde hair, she was a better real life match to her model. but never you mind that i had blonde hair, too.

i would be sleek and cut my biceps with curls just like wonder woman. i would put my hands on my hips and save the world, too.

or, at least until i got a blue jumpsuit and could become an airplane pilot. strike force, i'm ready!

roadside fruit stand

2008-08-12T21:16:00.002-04:00

if the southeast coast is a sultry, ripe peach dripping with caresses from the lush greens of Savannah to the soft blue-greys of the Outer Banks, then the inner northeast is an apple.

Crisp. Bright. Sheep speckled
on it's round ruby hillside.
Sharp as it is sweet.

rally west virginia

2008-08-04T09:20:00.007-04:00

anders and i competed in Rally West Virginia this past weekend. from day one, it was an adventure.

let's back up to prepping the car. first, we had a new STi transmission put into the Impreza (remember, it has an H6 3.0L, not the stock 1.8L). then, we needed new wheels, tires, and brakes. anders picked up the car to discover a weird knocking sound on deceleration. back to the shop for a fix.

by this time, we're only one week away from the event. a few friends came over, while i was out of town, to help. we canned the "paint the car" idea due to time constraints and rain. we found a last minute volunteer for crew. thanks, thor!! the rest of the prep and packing was going right on schedule... until i reached the "paperwork" section.

what?! the van hasn't been registered since 2006? i couldn't find the paperwork anywhere. ugh!

day one: go to dmv, pay for new tag and registration.

check.

finally, we are on the road at 10am and tootling along as fast as the poor old '85 Dodge van can haul us. POW! a significant amount of fish-tailing, screeching, and thumping ensue. yes, we had a flat... on the van. fortunately, the trailer was connected because the tread ended up as an alligator wrapped around the wheel and hub. the wheel was skidding on the asphalt at our impressive 70mph on I-40 at Burlington (read: 8 lanes of traffic on the interstate). the trailer kept the van from spinning and going completely bonkers on the highway. whew!

we pulled over, jumped out and began the tire change. it was scary. the shoulder was hardly big enough for us and traffic wasn't pulling over. (note: you should always pull into the far lane when passing vehicles stopped on the side of the road.) a highway patrolman showed up just as we were completely the tire change. he was able to recommend a tire place at the next exit.

so, we went searching for a replacement tire. the van happens to have 16.5" wheels so it was a real search. at the second location, we met with success. an hour later, we were back on the road with a new spare. this time, we decided to drive a steady 60mph to keep the tires cooler and hope that no more of them decide to blow.

needless to say, we were going to be later than expected in Elkins, WV. this created a minor freak show at registration (they had asked me to do licensing). seriously folks... it's not like i could predict the tire blow-out.

we arrived at 7pm in Elkins. i was dropped off at registration to calm my fellow panicked competitors. anders went to conduct the novice competitor orientation. we both finished up around 11pm and were able to settle into our roles as competitors.
(note to self: never volunteer at an event in which you are also a competitor!)

day one of racing: the skies were blue and the weather was perfect. we launched into our stages with enthusiasm and high hopes. the car felt great! it is very fast and impressed us with it's ability to handle the corners and uphill climbs with ease. anders and i felt a bit rusty from lack of practice (it's been three years since we've competed together) so, it took a few stages to feel our old rhythm return.

stage 6: ! R4o.c. into... and we're wide into the corner. braking. throttle. nope... we're taking a controlled off the edge of the stage. we gently stopped at a tree which loosened our front passenger headlamp and broke the front passenger turn signal. this popped us into a tree on the driver rear quarter panel. at least we stopped. run! triangles! safety! thumbs up! "ok" sign!

anders checked the car while i notified passing competitors that we were okay. yep, the engine is fine. let's get the tow rope and get this car outta here! we were about 10ft off the stage, downhill. fast sweep pulled a bit and managed to get us half-way up the mountain. slow sweep, with it's heavy duty pulling power, pulled us out after two tries and ingenious suggestions from seamus burke and tom lawless. hurray! off we went to the next stage.

the driver's side a-arm was bent so at the next stop, we put the tow rope around it, tied it to a tree, and pulled the a-arm out so the tire was no longer rubbing on the wheel well. we made it to the next stage and a delay enabled us to fit right back into line. we finished day one!

at service, thor and anders began working on the repairs. fortunately, we had a spare a-arm. thor did a fantastic job of replacing it! anders re-wired the rally computer which was also on the fritz. i zip-tied a few misplaced and loose bumper parts. matt smith bought us dinner (thank you!!) and we finished up around 11pm.

back at the hotel, anders and thor relaxed in the pool while i prepped for day two. then, we all crashed out.

day two: success!

it rained overnight and we anticipated mud and slippy roads instead of dust. there was a minor snafu in the start order, which was quickly fixed with an inquiry. instead of being 29th on the road, we were moved back up to 12th on the road. this worked out well for us. we were trading times with hordjik, bridwell, and eixenberger. fun!!

anders and i had a few moments of confusion and lack of synchronization. most of the day, the notes were spot on and the car handled fantastically well. it was brilliant. there were the usual types of delays (stage set-up and communications). the most hilarious delay was "hunting dogs on stage" which had to be removed because they would not be shooed away. removal included putting the dogs in a zero car and driving the dogs to safety! that had the competitors laughing out loud!

by the end of the day, we were told that we had been excluded from the rally due to exceeding our maximum permitted lateness on day one. another quick inquiry later, we were back in due to super rally rules for the usrc. of course, we were still excluded from day one of the atlantic rally cup but, we were scored for day two of the atlantic rally cup.

success: we finished sixth overall for day two stages of the atlantic rally cup. awesome!!

the best part of the awards ceremony is getting to see all our friends and hearing all the cool rally stories!

the drive home was uneventful. the car is now in the garage with a list of "to-do's" for the next rally. which one? we don't know yet. but, we're looking forward to it no matter where it is!

the lonely road

2008-07-26T21:58:00.005-04:00

i spent last weekend traveling to Missouri and this weekend, i'm driving home.

i had imagined that i would blog while i was traveling out and while i was there. keep myself busy and entertained. this was not to be. the first hotel did not have wi-fi and the we disconnected the internet in Missouri while we rearranged the study.

so, here i am in Tennessee trying to remember everything i've wanted to say all week.

on the drive out, i say a beaver trying to cross I-40 in Knoxville. he managed to cross the shoulder and one lane before i passed by. i am optimistic that he managed to cross all eight lanes. but, seriously, what kind of natural urge makes one want to cross such a big road?! where's that dam!?!

i went to see aunt alice and nancy, chris, charles, abigail and spencer. i also managed to squeeze in time with gma, anita, beth, corinn, and sara. it was a good visit!

alice needed assistance reclaiming her house from the junk of molly's latest remodel and other stuff that had just accumulated over the past few months. as mentioned above, we managed to clear out the study and the dining room. we had a yard sale ("tag sale" for all the north-easterners) and she made a bit of green off it. then, we hauled off the remainder to a local shelter.

whew! there is simply nothing better than lightening the psychic load by getting rid of excess stuff. there is a reason why it's bad feng shui to have things under your bed.

victory number 1: clean study and an empty dining room. alice can decorate it up to her heart's content now.

victory number 2: alice's cat "tiger", the literal attack cat, didn't attack me once. (ask Anders about his encounter with tiger!)

i left early this morning and drove to Linden, Tennessee. i did manage to get mildly lost in Jackson, Tennessee (the signs for 412 disappear and i had to dig out the gps to help me become found).

tomorrow is the ten-hour day but i'm going to home to my honey so the time should fly. i can't wait for hugs and kisses and my own sweet bed and pillow! there's no place like home.

turtle patrol

2008-06-15T16:38:00.004-04:00

i have been thinking of my sister, susan, lately. it's been four years since she died but, i think of susan every day... fortunately, with lovely thoughts of her laughter, or cooking expertise, or fond childhood memories or fun adult times together.

anders and i just returned from a trip to Barbados. anders and i are not the type to sit around, lounge around and just bake on the beach. we didn't have a
"vacation", we had an adventure! we spent a couple days relaxing and
catching up on sleep. then, we spent 2.5 days at Rally Barbados, which we thoroughly enjoyed. (more on this later!)

the rest of our trip was spent exploring the island, including a sea cave with anemones in the tidal pools!

the beach where we stayed was mild, with waves that were broken by a coral reef before hitting shore. early in the week, anders gently and patiently taught me how to snorkel. then, later in the week, we went on a catamaran cruise. during the cruise, we swam off the west coast, snorkeled above a coral reef and shipwreck, and swam with sea turtles.

swimming with the sea turtles was simply amazing. one large sea turtle - as big as me - swam underneath me. for a moment his shell skimmed my stomach and i reached out to touch him. another came up for a close look at me and another butted heads with anders in search of food!

actually, all of it was amazing. i was surprised by beautiful, colorful schools of fish and a nearly invisible octopus, too! the world beneath the water is stunning.

i am very proud of myself for being able to swim in deep sea and snorkel...
and love it. i thought a lot about susan. i had a lot of mixed
emotions. sometimes, I thought my heart would hurt so much it would
stop. but, in the end, God and the world gave me a wonderful gift.

i think that day is the greatest achievement of my life so far. and i'm
hanging on to that gift.

thinking of susan, 1975 - 2004

a day in barbados

2008-04-23T09:11:00.001-04:00

waves lapping at feet
sand crab popping in and out
hammock dream for me

realization

2008-03-17T21:50:00.003-04:00

1. i've come to realize that my butt:
is always behind me, 100%

2. i've come to realize that when i talk:
funny is better than serious... seriously

3. i've come to realize that if i love someone:
i need to let things go, even when it annoys me a lot

4. i've come to realize that i need:
grace

5. i've come to realize that i lost:
a "favorite" sweater every time i moved to a new apartment

6. i've come to realize that i hate it when:
other drivers cut me off on the highway

7. i've come to realize that, if i'm drunk:
i usually speak chinese

8. i've come to realize that marriage:
is hard work

9. i've come to realize that i really:
am not alone

10. i've come to realize that i'll always be:
funny and clumsy (not necessarily in that order)

11. i've come to realize that i like:
thunderstorms, dogs, dirt, and trying new foods

12. i've come to realize that the last time i cried was:
i felt stupid

13. i've come to realize that my cell phone is:
a much-loved luxury

14. i've come to realize that when i wake up in the morning:
i can be happy instead of grouchy

15. i've come to realize that before i go to sleep at night:
i have to roll over twice before i get completely comfortable

16. i've come to realize that now i'm thinking about:
how grouchy i used to be in the mornings when i was in college (sorry cheryl)

17. i've come to realize that babies:
are expensive but worth it (here's hoping!)

18. i've come to realize that, when i get on Myspace:
(or any space) i waste time

19. I've come to realize that today:
i lived without regret

20. i've come to realize that tonight i will:
probably snuggle up with tico like i do almost every night

21. i've come to realize that tomorrow i will:
be up earlier than normal to make an early meeting

22. i've come to realize that i really want:
more than i every really need

highschool memories

2008-03-17T21:36:00.003-04:00

ah... the days...

1. who was your best friend? Esther

2. what sports did you play? none. i sucked at sports until i started rallying!

3. what kind of car did you drive? i took the bus usually.

4. friday night... night markets, tea shops, or the department store, i think.

5. were you a party animal? no. i was the antithesis of a party animal!

6. were you considered a flirt? no way.

7. were you in band, orchestra, or choir? yes.

8. were you a nerd? i think so. i took computer programming and i loved english and history!

9. did you get suspended/expelled? no. that was elementary school.

10. can you sing the fight song? i didn't even know we had a fight song, until i read my sister's answer and discovered she can sing it! wow.

11. who was your favorite teacher? mrs. wicks.

12. where did you sit during lunch? on the plaza.

13. what was your school's full name? morrison christian academy.

14. school mascot? mustangs.

15. did you go to prom? we didn't really have a "prom" but i did go the the "junior/senior" banquet with toni partti.

16. if you could go back and do it again, would you? not so much, really.

17. what do you remember most about graduation? taking pictures on the plaza.

18. where did you go senior skip day? i don't think we had one of those... if i skipped anything, i did it by staying in the senior lounge.

19. i deleted question 19.

20. were you in any clubs? nope.

21. where did you go most often for lunch? the plaza.

22. have you gained some weight since then? geez... i hope so!

23. who was your senior prom date? see my answer to number 15.

24. are you planning on going to your 10 year reunion? no. it was in 2002 and i missed it (if we had one, which i'm not sure we did).

25. who was your home room teacher? we didn't have homeroom. we had Bible class first and my teachers were (in order of favorites): mr. burke and mr. robinson.

26. i also deleted question 26. don't ask me why because i already forgot!

27. who was your high school sweetheart? if i had one, it was mike.

28. i have no idea what happened to question 28.

29. did you win prom queen or king? heck no. (thank goodness!)

silly girls...

2008-03-17T21:27:00.004-04:00

i'm bored and relaxing before sleepy-bed-time so i'm stealing my sister's crazy quizes and answering some of them here. just for the fun of it.

You.
Can.
Only.
Type.
One.
Word.

1. Where is your cell phone? desk
2. Your boyfriend/girlfriend? yes
3. Your hair? blonde
4. your mother? here
5. Your father? gone
6. Your favorite thing? food
7. Your favorite food? salty
8. Your favorite drink? milk
9. Your dream car? rally
10. The room you're in? mine
11. Your ex? uhhh...
12. Your fear? uncertainty
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? mom
14. Who did you hang out with last night? anders
15. What you're not good at? relaxing
16. Muffins? no
17. One of your wish list items? wires
18. Where you grew up? Taichung
19. The last thing you did? type
20. What are you wearing? clothes
21. what aren't you wearing? eyeglasses
22. Your pets? tico
23. Your computer? mac
24. Your life? changing
25. Your mood? excited
26. Missing? family
27. What are you thinking about right now? sister
28. Your car? baja
29. Your work? there
30. Your summer? hot
31. Your relationship status? engaged
32. Favorite color? bright
33. When is the last time you laughed? tonight
34. Last time you cried? forgot
35. School? nah
36. TV Show? Lost

the next big thing...

2008-02-18T11:05:00.006-05:00

sandblast rally is finished. i'm sorting through all the rally stuff, trying to get ready (early) for rally tennessee.

fortunately, the wedding planning has been relaxed for both of us. the only major change is that we are not going snow-boarding for our honeymoon (so sad)! and we're not going early. instead, we're going to get lost in the desert for a couple of days after the wedding! (watch out christmas tree pass... as we go racing through!)

we're gettin' married...

2008-01-31T14:15:00.000-05:00

yes, anders and i are tying the knot... las vegas style!

check out our wedding page (courtesy of theknot.com).

i'm so excited! all the planning is uber easy and i'm feeling rather relaxed about the "big day". i have a dress (purchased online - new- from ebay.com for $45) and all the accoutrement. tickets are purchased.

anders needs to buy a suit.
i need to find a gluten-free cake.
that's about all that's left in the planning phase.

next up? early honeymoon! yippee!

drink

2008-01-27T15:35:00.000-05:00

it seems as though a few years have passed since i've been in a car instead of the mere five months.

this is how it is with rally... it take you for a ride and never lets you go.

i'm working on entries and registration paperwork for Sandblast Rally. not for myself. i'm helping organize the event. we have 75+ competitors so it's quite a task. i have a file for each competitor, which includes an administrative check sheet detailing all the required documents for registration: entry, fee, car/bike information, co/driver information, service vehicle information, vehicle (state) registrations, proof of insurance with valid dates of coverage and limits (100/200/50), drivers licenses, sanctioning body memberships and competition licenses. whew!

each competitor has the opportunity to help me out by sending in all the paperwork early, which means i have a chance to check it and verify it in advance of the event. of course, any competitor who doesn't do this just pays a late fee. fortunately, our competitors are responsive to my reminder emails and i have a nice stack of "express" regisrants.

this rally comes early in the year for me. it's the first event in the NASA Rally Sport season and it's always in february. i have helped organize this rally for three years and i haven't felt ready for it yet.

i spend much of january just catching up on work (budgets are due). and all my evenings are filled with the daily ritual of dinner, dishes, laundry, a tv show here and there, reading (usually for work) and being with friends. now add to that the extra hours of rally prep.

today i'm wondering why i do it. it doesn't compare to volunteering in ways that we traditionally think as helpful: feeding the hungry, clothing the poor, sheltering the homeless. what do i get from rally? what am i giving back?

when i rally, i receive the gift of moments dedicated to one singular task. nothing else in the world matters except my car, my driver, my road. i forget the anxieties of work or the frustrations of a dysfunctional family. i forget my inadequacies.

in those moments, i am centered. i have a destination, a purpose. i live and breathe it until the car comes to halt at the finish control. then i settle in a bit more comfortably into my seat and drink in the energy i have received from the world.

so, forget. breathe. come home tired and exhilarated. live.

the warrior returns

2007-09-12T21:05:00.001-04:00

well... for those who don't know, my brother is a pilot for the USMC. he has been deployed for the past six months. today was his homecoming.

richard arrived safely home today at 10:20am. anders and i went to the MCAS to welcome him home. there was a big party there to greet everyone. they had a dj, Dunkin' Donuts, coffee, soda, water and fruit for everyone. The kids had a great time playing on a blow-up bouncy castle type thing... we made posters to welcome everyone and I made a sign that said "Welcome Home 1st Lt Feistel".

they sent 4 HMH-434's to Cherry Point to pick up everyone so they wouldn't have to ride a bus back home. When the 434's came into view and circled the tarmac, the dj played "The Flight of the Valkyries". Watching the helos fly in and hearing the music and feeling proud of everyone for serving us and our country... it brought some tears to our eyes. anders and i were tearing up and feeling all misty-eyed.

after the 434's landed, we were allowed to walk out onto the tarmac and everyone stood there shouting, cheering and holding up the signs for our boys (well, some were waiting for girls). after all the little ceremony stuff, we started welcoming everyone home. richard turned around and walked off so i had to go run after him. he was so surprised! he didn't expect us to be there to welcome him so it was a fun surprise.

(he thought that he would call me when he arrived. yeah right... like i'd let my baby brother go off to war and then not be there to welcome him home!)

we hung out for a while, met some people, and then took richard home to see pauli. pauli was going nuts... she was so excited to see him! rich also received a couple text messages from abby so we know she is happy that he's home, too! ;)

so, rich is safe and sound at home. he won't be able to travel out of the area for a while so we took jeff's car down to him. jeff's going to let him borrow it for a while. and, at least rich is around so we can drive down to see him! :)

hurray for my big little brother!

spring

2007-04-30T10:43:00.000-04:00

spring is here but it's not exactly the "in like a lion, out like a lamb" type of season.

march was cool but had it's warm days. april was full of jokes: snow on good friday, a late freeze that killed my blooming palm tree (long story), and 90F temps in it's last days.

i have tomatoes, peppers, oregano, verbena, chives, and basil ready for planting. in the meantime, marjoram, thyme, sage and other various plants & flowers are blooming all over the yard. it's my favorite time of the year!

anders and i have been swamped with rally organization. seriously, anders is up to his eyeballs in paperwork. we finished up a rockin' start to the season with Sandblast Rally. a week later, we discovered that Rally Tennessee wasn't going to happen unless we organized it. so...

yeah, we're suckers. but, we suckered a few other people to help out and now, thanks to shea, frick, ely, and mr. spicer, the rally is happening this weekend. we even added a new stage!

i'm not racing, though. :( three weeks ago, i had surgery on my foot to correct alignment of my metatarsals, remove bone spurs and clean up some joint deterioration. i'm happily on the mend. i spent two weeks in a cast and am now in a walking boot / soft cast. i have one more week in it until i graduate to a tennis shoe. i have to say, this experience has certainly increased my respect for modern medicine and pain-killers!

anyway, i'll be at the rally but just helping out.

my next event will be which ever event i can coordinate to run with brian rutledge. we are both overdue for a good run! i'm hoping for west virginia.

drivin' the most beautiful roads of Georgia and Tennessee...

2006-11-27T22:25:00.000-05:00

... who wouldn't want to be me?

the X-Games were a success. the young punks and old schooler's loved the super special stage and Colin McRae's accidental roll. i enjoyed watching it a few times myself! you can see a great video on YouTube.

since august, i've been engulfed in the lives of 300 first-year college students.

respite came in september and an invitation to sit with Brian Rutledge from NY in Rally Tennessee. we were set up nicely in our friend's car (thank you, Donal!) and determined to finish.

remember: this is the same rally in which i rolled last year with Kirk Knestis.

the roads were as winding and sweet to drive as i remembered. Brian and i got along famously and even lost ourselves on a transit while we mucked around with a bit of ABBA playing in the stereo!

Brian drove well and we achieved our goal of finishing in the top ten! we came in at eight overall with first place trophies in our class (super stock). there are several great photos of us on Rally Planet.

nothing beats a little back-roads fun in the south... yee-haw!

dog days in the heat

2006-08-02T21:50:00.000-04:00

as Anders would say, it's friggin' hot as a muggety-mug out here. that's pretty hot.

i'm not doing much in the garage these days. waiting on cooler weather, i guess. maybe a little unmotivated lately. i haven't been on the rally boards or forums... just kinda takin' a break.

the next rally is in Tennessee. it's a tarmac rally and includes some of the sweetest roads in the south. Rally Tennessee is on labor day weekend so we'll be heading over to volunteer. i don't think i'll be sitting with anyone this year.

i watched the ESPN television broadcast of STPR and today rally takes a spin in the X Games!

yoo-hoo! now i'm pumped! millions of people are going to read about my favorite sport! hurray!

catch ya'll later... i have some racing to follow.

summer lull

2006-07-18T16:44:00.000-04:00

summer is full on and we are slogging through hot, HOT days in north carolina.

my racing in rally is on temporary hold for the summer or until cash flow eases a bit. for the racers out there: you know what i mean. i know, right?

anders has been working on morse code and installing his new ham radio in the recce car. he also worked as a steward for Rally West Virginia.

we are liable to be in some form of attendance at Rally Tennessee. it's an international rally this year so i'm hoping i'll be there in the silly seat (codriving). we'll have to wait and see...

not much other news. catch ya on the next heat wave!

2006-05-23T10:52:00.000-04:00

the two Amy's in NY

the story of two amy's

2006-05-23T10:31:00.000-04:00

about three years ago august, Anders and i were driving home from maine forest rally and were stuck on the Tappanzee Bridge in traffic. we were, of course, driving Vantro and had the rally car on the trailer behind us.

we negotiated traffic and after many grueling hours of dog-tired driving, arrived home.

a few weeks later, we received a mysterious email from someone in ny re: our whereabouts on that particular day, going that particular direction on the Tappanzee Bridge.

freaky. i know, right?!

so the story goes... an expectant mother and father were in the car next to us having a serious discussion about their future child's name. Eric and Anjte looked out the window and say "amy feistel" on the side of the rally car. they decided then and there that if their child was a girl, she would be named after amy the race car driver.

Eric googled us, found us and we awaited news. then, in november, baby Amy was born. since then, i am the lucky recipient of family news and pictures!

but the story doesn't end here!

as you know, i went to ny in hopes of competing in rally ny. Eric and Anjte discovered that i would be in liberty, ny for the rally finish. they packed Amy and new baby brother, John, into the car and drove there to find me.

i was happily congratulating my fellow rallyists on the main street of liberty when i heard a voice call out my name. i turned to see Eric and John. Amy and Anjte were just a few steps away. what a treat! both Amy's were very happy to see each other!

little Amy was excited to see all the dirty cars and big Amy was happy to show them off. i borrowed Donal McGivney's car and little Amy took a pretend race around the block to her friend's house.

after a few introductions to friends and pictures, the Amy's and all said farewell.

little Amy's visit was the highlight of my trip! thanks, Amy. i hope to see you again soon!

helping out a friend

2006-04-21T13:03:00.000-04:00

hey... here is an unabashed plug for a friend's web site and non-profit org.

Cycle For Schools is the brain-child of Patrick Cook-Deegan. he is an outstanding young man with a passion for people in need.

read about it and, hopefully, support it.

thanks!

the RNY highlights

2006-04-21T12:27:00.000-04:00

on april 4th, i attended the Nicky Grist Co-Driving Workshop at rally new york. the workshop was a great experience -- intense, intimate and engaging! more on this later... it will require an entire post alone.

rny was a bit of a disappointment. the car wasn't ready and Cyril didn't bring it down from the city. short story: bad turbo, issues with the engine, replaced turbo, still no boost, still trouble with engine.

so, i didn't race.

i helped USUK Racing's crew get prepared for the rally (their first time to crew). i also was able to hang out with my friends and fellow competitors: Scott & Carrie Wilburn, Colin & Kristie Bombara, Andrew Havas and others. we spectated stages on friday and saturday. we witnessed Tom Lawless' amazing save on SS13 (downhill into L2 exposure on outside) where he had only the driver's side tires on the road, in mud, and managed to pull the car through the corner! i helped out a few other teams with inquiries, light reflection issues, etc.

i met little Amy -- my namesake -- after the rally, at the finish expose in Liberty, NY. what a cutie! i'll write an entire post about her, too. she was the highpoint of the weekend!

all in all: happy times!

rally new york

2006-04-03T10:29:00.001-04:00

well, i'm off to the catskills and rally new york. i leave tomorrow for the event.

wednesday will be the highlight. i have a chance to attend the nicky grist workshop! i'm completely psyched for the opportunity to train under a world rally champion. i plan to take copious amounts of notes to share with those who cannot attend, too.

thursday is recce (reconnaissance for the uninitiated). we race friday and saturday. i'm sitting with cyril kearney this time around. the roads are tarmac, generally wide and smooth. we're starting 15th on the road so we should have a good ride.

a story will follow, as usual... after i return home, sleep and recuperate! ;)

UPDATE:

i am not running rally ny. Cyril's engine trouble meant the car didn't even make it down here for the rallye. in the meantime, i've been busy helping other teams prep their cars, helping other codrivers write notes, and learning from Nicky Grist in the codriver course. The course was really informative and I have notes to share with everyone.

today was recconnaissance. cheers!

bits o' news

2006-03-07T14:21:00.000-05:00

my lovely sister reminded me that i have not posted since november. yikes!

since november i...

spent a perfectly snowy week in maine

visited my family in missouri

participated in a clinical drug trial for celiac disease
(and gave my blood to a bunch of white-coated vampires)

and,

helped anders organize sandblast rally

organizing a rally has been a huge learning experience for both of us. anders did most of the work, coordinated everything from volunteers to roads to radio show-time, to the after-party. i just helped with registration.

thanks to his hard work and the support of lots of other people, the rally was a success. we've been getting good feedback and are already thinking of improving next year's event. there are over 500 pictures on the official website so, check it out!

in other news... my brother and his dog, pauli - yes, named after the beer, are moving about 2 hours away.

next up on the list? another visit to missouri next week and a short stop in chattanooga for some r & r.

gratefulness

2005-11-29T10:20:00.000-05:00

i am thankful for...

a little chihuahua
who wags his tail every time i walk through the door

a chef
who made gluten-free chocolate chip cookies especially for me

a friend
who helped me venture back into my life when i was overwhelmed by grief

a beautiful piece of jade
that reminds me of how much i'm loved

holiday projects

2005-11-21T09:00:00.000-05:00

so, the Green family household has a little holiday tradition: holiday projects! These range from chopping down trees, to fixing the grill, to working on project cars, to turning motorized toy boats into robots.

in fact, we begin saving projects for the holiday so we'll have something to do when we're stuffed to the gills with food and need motivation to move around a bit.

this year, 2 of the Green boys are converging on caniff lane and bringing projects with them. Anders and Ken are already planning and Max will be here shortly with Ines' new-to-her car as a project.
my projects? designing custom organizer trays for my kitchen drawers, staining my music stand, and cooking enough food to feed a small army. this year i'm also trying my hand at gluten-free pies for our turkey day dinner. my spring strawberry-rhubarb pie was a success so i'm experimenting now with pecan and apple pies. yummy!

if the pies look good, i'll post pictures!

car tightens and... roll

2005-09-27T20:01:00.000-04:00

rally tennessee was a lesson.

the plan was to sit for kirk knestis with cameron conover as our crew. anders would provide towing services but planned to be deputy chairman of the rally and competitor relations officer.

early friday a.m.
anders left with trailer and service vehicle for greensboro, nc
amy headed off to work for a (ugh) meeting

midday friday
anders and jon kerfoot were on the road, towing the ibt volkswagon
amy met up with kirk and cameron for the drive out to linden, tn

friday night
a brief 10 hours later, we all arrived in linden to discover that all the shops and restaurants close at 7pm. so much for dinner!

after checking into the rally at the best rally headquarters ever, we headed to the local truck stop for "dinner" and the hotel. i immediately began work on the notes, discovered a few minor discrepancies and made notes for questions to ask my fellow navigators.

early saturday a.m.
what a glorious morning! the sky was blue, the temperature was balmy and i was ready to rally! of course, steve duffy and carl fisher helped to clear up most of my navigation questions.

i shopped for crew groceries for lunch and dinner, checked out the local restaurant options for late in the evening, and headed to service. by the time i arrived at the service area, the car was ready to go. i had plenty of time to pal around with my rally friends and catch up on the news.

midday saturday
kirk and i started dead last on the road -- no biggie for a new guy in rally. kirk has lots of track and navigation experience but this was his first rally as a driver.

kirk and i decided to recce (reconnaisance) the first few stages. this gave kirk a chance to see the roads and practice the stage notes calls (learning everything from R1 to L6, /cr to < 5 > 2). the stages were beautiful: sweet tarmac with just a bit of gravel on the outside corners or in the edge of a ditch-hook corner. now.. if we could just avoid hitting the roaming packs of dogs.

day one stages went well. we had a few novice errors and a right turn when i clearly said left. but... i figured all is well that ends well.

last stage
tight corner, L2, the car spins 180. i tell kirk to turn the car around and drive straight through the triangle patch of grass to the road. what?? he can't believe i'm telling him to drive on the grass. i gestured. drive straight ahead, get back on the road, drive through the grass. the spectator yelled it, too. kirk finally got the car turned around (does not drive straight through the grass) and back on the road. we finished for the day.

whew.

i decided to prep the remaining stages the next morning (after i get key info re: stage changes from the rally chairman) and crashed out at the hotel.

sunday a.m.
second round of grocery shopping at the local (and only) store.

first stage
delayed. we commiserated with our fellow rallyists over the delay, where to take a leak in the woods, etc. finally, the stage was ready and zero car goes through. as i harness myself back into the car, i overhear kirk comment, "so we're only seconds behind you?" oh boy. of course, we're just supposed to be doing this for fun, to test the car... you know all those lines. go figure that the driver has changed the plan midstream because we're only seconds behind someone!

beautiful stage. lots of open 5s and 6s, sweeping curves, some tight 3s and 4s. wow. then i feel the hopping. this isn't new. i felt it yesterday, too. i didn't like it -- too much bouncing instead of sliding. i tell kirk this is NG (not good) and i suggested we slow down. he reassured me that this is normal for tarmac. (are you sure??, i'm thought to myself.) then, the car hit some gravel and we slid. ah. i gave a sigh of relief. sliding feels normal. then i felt the car go sideways and tighten. in a split second i thought, "we're gonna roll." i looked out the window, past the window nets...

and we rolled.

my side first, of course. (drivers always hit the navigator's side first.) as we rolled, i saw my hands fly up in the air. oops.. i reminded myself to assume the "classic position" and pulled arms, feet, head inward. finally we were back on four wheels. we did a "are you okay" check, i forgot and remembered that there was a window net to release, we got the triangles out and ran. kirk went running in the wrong direction. i began to follow him, to tell him he's wrong but, then i heard the car behind us coming up quickly.

i decided it's better to leave kirk at risk and get one triangle out on the correct side of the car and hold up the ok sign. i did and kirk soon figured out that he's in the wrong place as a car goes whizzing by him. we waited for sweep. i hitched a ride to the stage end as kirk got the car off the road.

the car, we discovered, had leaked some fluids but was driveable. it drove onto the trailer, which is a good day in rally according to anders. meanwhile, anders and i had a great time spectating with our friends from new york and watching the competition on the roads.

as usual, the rally ended with a trophy presentation and a party back at the hotel. kirk, cameron, anders and i replayed the roll with our many friends as we analyzed the car, the body damage and the smashed up windows. we surmised the cause of the roll and moved on to other rally topics. after a great night of hangin' out, i was ready for sleep.

the lessons:
- i can trust my experience and my instincts -- when the car doesn't feel right, it's not right
- the driver better do what the codriver says, even when it's okay for tarmac
- the next driver that doesn't is going to get a tongue-lashing
- i remembered all the safety protocols when we rolled and we kept everyone safe

i'm sure the roll would have been spectacular to see. i will never forget those seconds in my lifetime.

will i rally again? are you crazy? of course.

aah... sweet tennessee

2005-08-19T16:09:00.000-04:00

on labor day weekend i'll be off to sit with Kirk Knestis in the tarmac-only RallyTN.

we're psyched. this is a long-awaited return to rally for kirk. of course, i'm just happy to be in the silly-seat once more.

the gti is prepped and the test run last weekend was smooth.

anders and kirk will drive out early friday while cameron conover (our trusty service crew) and i will head out midday.

see you in the forest!

dryad quest and shitepoke rallies

2005-06-29T14:51:00.000-04:00

the adventure started after work on a wednesday night. it was a dark and stormy night. seriously.

the workday had been horrendous and i was looking forward to my already scheduled four-day weekend. anders would be heading off to pennsylvania for a rally and the weekend was going to be all about me: bubble bath, book reading in bed, painting the kitchen yellow.

i walk in the door to hear anders boom, "good news, everyone! amy has a message." andrew havas, a national rally driver, had called with an exciting offer. havas had been on sabbatical from the sport while he travelled europe and south asia. he was newly returned to the u.s. and ready to rally again. he wanted me to fly out to seattle and test-drive a new mistubishi evo with him this weekend! it would mean changing my weekend plans by one day. i debated and hesitated...

then, i logged onto expedia and bought the ticket. why not!? i needed to get away and rally sounded like the best option!

36 hours later, i was headed west with suit and helmet in hand.

the new rally car was built by pete vanbogart of cascade autosport. when i arrived in seattle, pete's wife, ginger, picked me up at the airport. we finally arrived at the shop after a couple errands to the grocery store and starbucks. there, the service vehicle was packed, the car was loaded -- everything was ready to rally. havas and i caught up on hometown news (he was a resident of nc) while testing out my helmet and making a few modifications on the communications system.

the rest of the day was dedicated to relaxing and having fun -- in a gold chevy galaxy (courtesy of john allen's grandmother)! havas and i took the ferry to bainbridge island. while waiting for the ferry, we met a lovely elementary school teacher named chris who was thoroughly entertained by our antics, picture taking and rally stories. havas was nearly tackled by allan perry, who also happened to be heading to bainbridge before joining us at the rally. allan gave me several great co-driver tips and we all made plans to carpool to shelton, washington the next morning.

john allen's quirky house on bainbridge island is home to 2 lovely cats, a sweet bmw, a couple bikes and a model-t ford in near mint condition. john was a fantastic host and my overnight stay included a tour of the island, grocery shopping at the natural foods market, more co-driver tips and camping out in the living room with the cats.

the next morning, after a lost-cat scare, we all headed to shelton, washington. it was a drizzly morning but the sun came out just as we pulled into the service area. i quickly began the usual round of paperwork while havas and our crew, nate, finalized details on the car. i made the usual pit rounds and said hello to a few old friends: ben bradley, the tabor racing team, and fling-pu racing.

our first two stages were a bit rough. we were working off tulips, i was late calling a couple corners, havas was confused by the numbering system, etc. after about 2 stages and some minor snafus, we were synced and ready to really feel some gravel. our plan was simple: test the car, don't track competitor times, just focus on our own synchronization and teamwork. it was a fantastic plan. we finished 2nd overall for dryad quest rally.

the next morning, we started second on the road. i've never been that far up in the start order. let me tell you, it was amazing. the roads were sweet: barely damp enough to keep the dust down but sunny skies above for plenty of great scenery while in transit. our plan was slightly modified: test the car, each 1st run on a stage would be a fast recce, the 2nd run would be at speed, don't track competitor times, just have a good time.

what a day! we were flying through stages until stage 3 (the 1st run on a 24 mile stage). then the big noise started -- banging and clunking under the car. fearful that we may have broken something in the gearbox, we slowed down and finished the stage. we arrived at service expecting the car to be broken. our awesome crew had prepped food and coffee for us and i sat down to transpose my recce notes while the crew and havas diagnosed the car.

it was pouring cats & dogs rain during service but the crew jumped in to handle the situation. pete had graciously supplied me with a hot cup of coffee (caffeinated) for my final 23 miles. after a bit of under-car work, it was decided that we would finish the rally. "just take 'er easy," cautioned pete.

we did finish shitepoke rally at 5th overall and we improved our final stage time despite the car concerns! at the finish, pictures were taken by all and we celebrated the successful return of andrew havas to rally, the successful debut of the rally car, and the success of the entire team in finishing the rally. cheers...

and the talk continues

2005-06-13T12:40:00.000-04:00

seattle was an awesome weekend. i'll write a story soon. in the meantime, here are a couple links for your entertainment!

Rally Planet Article

Havspeed.com Press Release and Photos

go west rally girl...

2005-06-01T22:33:00.000-04:00

and i'm off to rally.

last minute decision on a whim.

seattle, washington for the dryad-shitepoke rallies.
(shitepoke is a bird)

sitting with superstar, andrew havas.

and i'm psyched!

spring

2005-04-29T14:59:00.000-04:00

And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.

~ Anais Nin

oregon or bust!

2005-04-26T14:20:00.000-04:00

Here's my Oregon Trails Rally story...

On Friday, April 22, LinaRacing team co-driver Amy Feistel caught a flight bound for Portland, Oregon, where she joined Lisa Klassen, driver for Team Rallyestar, at the Oregon Trails Rally. They planned to race all three ClubRally events in a 1976 Toyota Corolla named Prince.

Upon arrival in Portland, Amy went straight to the Portland International Raceway for registration and scrutineering. The rally began at the raceway and included 5 stages run on a combination of raceway tarmac, gravel and sod. Stages 1 through 4 went well and the team was eating dust from catching the car in front of them. The final stage had a long delay (nearly 2 hours) and the stage was run in reverse order, side-by-side with another rally car; so the team was 2nd car on stage. It was Amy's first time racing on tarmac and Lisa Klassen's first time racing on sod and wet grass. What an experience! Although the final stage ended up being cancelled, Lisa and Amy were able to finish all 5 stages, work out a few headset issues and sync up for Saturday's work.

Saturday was an awesome day. The day began with a rainy, podium start at the Hillsboro Stadium in Hillsboro, Oregon. Contrary to what everyone out west thinks, the roads are very much like the roads of Cherokee Trails International Rally in Tennessee. This is what Randy Zimmer told Amy to expect so she was prepared for what she saw. The "high crown" was minimal compared to high crowns Amy has experienced at Sandhills Sandblast Rally in South Carolina so that wasn't a problem either. Lisa Klassen drove well, careful and clean through corners. It was her first time to drive in rain and the team experienced a fog issue (on the inside of the window) which was easily resolved with a bit of anti-fog at service. Half-way through the day, the exhaust broke about 3 in. from the header. Amy suggested wrapping the exhaust in header-wrap to prevent burning wires and the team was able to finish the rally. The team's times *after* the exhaust issue were faster than beforehand. Part of that was due to some loss of power and Lisa Klassen's in-car promise to get the car over 5000 rpms and not let it drop. She came through on her promise and the team finished the day third in class!

Back at the Hillsboro Stadium on Sunday morning, the team discovers the car is mis-firing and had oil in 2 of the cylinders. Amy and crew member, Aaron, of LaengWorks, made a quick run to the parts store for spare spark plugs. Loaded with an extra quart of oil, the team started the day with high hopes. During the transit, the car began to lose power and refused to rev above 3000 rpms. A bit of testing on the road told the team that the only time revs were up was on the downhill. Additionally, the engine was stumbling in a cyclical manner every 4 seconds. The team still decided to press on for stage time. Three miles into the first stage, all power was gone and the car wasn't making it up the first steep climb. Despite Lisa's foot to the floor, the car was creeping up the mountainside. The team checked the fuel pressure, all was fine. Since the team could not diagnose the cause and could not make it out of the stage, Lisa and Amy decided to request heavy sweep and a tow.

Upon returning to service, the team discovered that the distributor cap was wasted, 2 of the contact points having melted completely. Auto parts stores were closed and no spares were to be found. The team submitted a withdrawal and did not finish (DNF) on Sunday. Fortunately for Lisa Klassen, the engine can be repaired in time for her next run at Rim of the World Rally. Amy says, "Oregon was beautiful and it was worth the trip to run Saturday. I had a great time and would do it again in a heart-beat!"

the racing season

2005-04-07T22:04:00.000-04:00

the racing season is in full gear.

march saw me standing at the main time control for Cherokee Trails International Rally, doing the usual checks in/out with Olga Orisek. in addition to being the rally secretary, of course.

it was fun once i remembered to spend some time with the competitors.

2 weekends from now i'll, happily, be back in the crazy seat for Oregon Trails Rally. i'm sittin' with Lisa Klassen, the crazy-haired rallyestar from california. she's fun and it will be a wild time.

Leia just happens to be in portland, oregon for the weekend and will get to see me race, too.

2 1/2 days of rally will be a challenge. i'm working on my plan: camel-back with H2O, low to zero carbs while racing, water and electrolytes, a few chewy spree, more water... you get the picture. plus lots of sleep: i'll be on east coast jet-lag!

you can check out the rally and (somewhat regular) updates at RallyAmerica.

too long, too cold

2005-03-22T20:41:00.000-05:00

this evening, while Anders and i sat at the kitchen table eating fresh chicken and vegetable soup, tico played his usual game.

"let me trot through the hallway and peek at those big guys eating food. maybe they won't notice me."
click click click (nails on the floor).

then, we heard something new.
a little crunch and paper-crunching kind of sound.

investigation revealed little tico had decided to eat the Halls package left on the staircase.

whew! nasty breath... but at least he can breathe through his nose now!

green

2005-02-15T22:33:00.000-05:00

i am pretty confident that spring is my favorite time of the year. i just get so excited about 1/4 inch bits of daffodils and tulips sticking out of the brown dirt or mulch!

the best part is being able to go out on the deck in a crisp morning, breathe deeply and know that soon, my fingers will be pulling up weeds and putting in new flowers.

i have big plans for the flowers this year.

perhaps they have big plans for me!

rainbows

2005-02-01T09:24:00.000-05:00

last week, on a particularly cloudy, cold day, i was driving to work and very much dreading to be there.

as i came to the top of the exit ramp, only 2 blocks from the office, i looked up into the sky.

there, i saw two beautiful rainbows side-by-side. one was misty and pale, the other bold and vibrant.

stunning.

dirt spray

2005-01-26T06:57:00.000-05:00

Anders and I went rallying this weekend. I worked a time control and he drove opening car on course.

Here's a sweet picture of him on stage.

What an incredible ride! I miss sitting in the seat... Looks like we'll be competing again by August of this year.

it makes my life yummy

2004-11-30T19:21:00.000-05:00

i was just appreciating all the baked goods i have in my life thanks to lee tobin at the whole foods market in raleigh-durham-chapel-hill.

lee began to bake GF (gluten-free) and now we have a GF bakery that delivers fresh baked yummies-for-my-tummy every single day!

wow.

mmm... pie... mmm... biscuit... mmm... cookies

the cannonball run

2004-10-16T13:08:00.000-04:00

last night we went to Ravi's house to watch Cannonball Run (the movie).

i remember watching this film as a child... ah, another little piece in the "why is amy into rally?" puzzle.

anyway, Ravi's new goal in life is to be mentioned in my "blah-blah-blah-blog-blog" (this is Sam's goal, too, but he won't admit it!)

well, boys, this is it! you've hit the big-time, now!

orange shirt day

2004-10-12T21:54:00.000-04:00

tangerine eternal mesa sunshine of a spotless marmalade dream mind...

she was once told that oranges and browns made her skin appear sallow.
it isn't true.
and now,
she sleeps in a tangerine dream.
she wears orange and brown pants and shirts.
she relishes the sunshines of autumns.

junk food

2004-10-11T20:19:00.000-04:00

this weekend i ate more junk food in 24 hours than i think i ever have in my life!

(well, i'm sure that is an exaggeration but it sure was fun!)

anders and i went to the mountains to see the leaves changing colors and breath some fresh air. we hiked up sugar mountain, to the top of the Big Birch Trail. (according to the website, it's one of the more difficult ski slopes... it lived up to its reputation. it was STEEP!)

i bought homemade jam from the only german woman at the oktoberfest. anders and i waltzed a bit on the deck to the oom-pah-pah band before heading back into town.

we drove around the appalachians, just taking in the views. jj's home, banner elk, wins the award for the best fall color!

we had dinner at a swank little place called coffeys. we watched buck-fifty movies. we saw more crunchy people than i've ever seen in a single setting.

we ate chips and candy bought by the pound (lb) at mast general store (the new one, built in 1920's) . it was great: maple candies, gummies, yougurt covered raisins, strawberry caramels, truffles. mmm.

wow. aah. sigh.

take 2 on what the world needs

2004-10-07T10:17:00.000-04:00

Kyle with his Pants!

takin' the subaru down dirt roads and feeling the spin

2004-10-06T20:07:00.000-04:00

yesterday the scca announced they are finished with rally.

done.
throwing it out the door.
too much money.
too much risk.

never mind that rally is safer than driving to work each day.

i miss... already...

although, in a moment of optimism, rally isn't finished (as some may say).

in fact, rally will happen the same way it has the past thirty years:
through the hard work and passion of rallyists, enthusiastic fans, never-tiring volunteers
- the real keepers of the sport

we'll rally.

a poem, of sorts

2004-09-29T20:24:00.000-04:00

celiac orange
violin
tico anders
books and poems
stern
firm
boundaries
love
grace
green vegetables and tofu
snowpeas
snowboard
falling "i've never had so much fun"
cars and racing
dust-just the smell-oil
subaru mgb truck, too
a wall of places visited
cowboy hat
mints plants flowers or tookses
shine as a star
dedicated
efficient
thin lips, happy feet
colors and other happy things
hats for rain
hats for sun
madeline or paddington bear
hats
chill, shiver, always need a sweater
comfy clothes
hugging step
mmm hmmm
that's what she said, too

a season

2004-09-28T13:45:00.000-04:00

there is a perpetual state of confusion in north carolina regarding "seasons" of the year.

clearly we have the usual seasons... spring, summer, fall, winter. we also have other seasons, namely, hurricane season. this is the time of year when hurricanes routinely visit our state and wreak havoc on our homes, land, and states of mind.

the other day, i overheard a woman saying, "first it was charley, then it was francis, then it was ivan! now they're saying we're getting another one named jeanne. i can't believe we're getting another hurricane!"

geez...

yep. that's why it's called a "season."

pond day

2004-09-19T21:11:00.000-04:00

today was pond day.

we have a frog pond in our backyard. it is so deep that anders can stand up in it to his neck!
anyway, it's been a unique ecosystem for some time and was due for a bit of cleaning.
anders pumped and syphoned and dipped and sprayed and pumped all the goop out of the pond... including 2 HUGE frogs. i'm not sure how long frogs can live but these guys looked really old.

the biggest one is about 6 inches long and fat. most of his legs are fatter than my fingers! wow!
he has pretty green skin and some reflective sections on his head... the areas shimmer colors of pink and purple when the light hits him right.

we're keeping the frogs in buckets of pond water until the pond is thoroughly clean and we refill it with new water. i hope they want to stay.

what the world needs...

2004-09-14T14:30:00.000-04:00

is some pants!

kyle, my nephew, just discovered the pleasure of wearing his pants on his head. tashina, his mother, was playing with him and his little pants ended up on his head like some kind of crazy jester hat. he laughed and chuckled a deep belly laugh.

i would post a picture but i haven't figured out how to do that yet.

ah. it feels good to laugh.
thanks, tashina and kyle!

chili and pie... mmm... pie and chili

2004-09-07T22:27:00.000-04:00

chili and pie. it's an annual event now.

they're already talking about next year!

so, here's how it works:
invite about 100 people and mention a competition
tell them to bring either chili or pie to enter into the competition
mention prizes and ribbons for 1st, 2nd and 3rd place
add all the fixin's (like sweet tea, lemonade, beer, whipped cream, onions, cheese, jalepenos, hot sauce, sour cream, biscuits and cornbread)
mention prizes and ribbons and kudos
sit back and watch the fun begin!

i ate so much chili that i thought i would pop.

next year (thanks to kath's suggestion) we're going to do time-trial tastings.
let's see how all the auto-x'rs out there handle it now!!

who won this year?

PIE: Peter H. 1st, Nathan (deese -in-the-box) 2nd, Kerfoot 3rd
CHILI: Mike M 1st, Robin 2nd , Kerfoot 3rd

next up on the calendar? it's not a christmas party!

forests and trees

2004-09-01T11:27:00.000-04:00

lately the forest and trees analogy has been applied to my life experiences (by other people) more often than i'm sure is proper.

today appears to be no exception. in the midst of a deadline/technology/bureaucratic-red-tape fiasco, i am told,

"It often does seem that we're mapping the forest by tripping over roots in the dark."

sigh.

my printer is insane

2004-08-31T08:41:00.000-04:00

so, i've moved into new digs on the east campus and am trying to settle into it, get comfy, etc.
i feel like goldilocks in papa bear's chair--the desk is big, the chair is big, i am small, little, ol' me.

the printer is another story. try imagining "office space" and the printer scenario.
PC LOAD LETTER!!!
yes, it is the message of the hour, the paper nightmare is here!

girl power

2004-08-26T13:41:00.000-04:00

after a brief rendevous with jess i realized the essential-ness of girl time.
damn it's good to be with the girls...

let's see.. lyn's writing a novel, amy's in & out of texas, janie is scoutin' out guatemala, lisa's cuddling up with sadie, jess is driving the u.s. looking for space, leia is beating the chill in alaska, krista has a new gig in winston-salem, mb is doing the mom-thing in kalamazoo, dione and nancy are doing the same in missouri, while corinn is looking cute as always in springfield.

wish i could bottle 'em up and keep 'em here.
better yet... wish i could clone myself and be with everyone.

i'm supposed to be planning a "girls vacation" for next year (to time perfectly with a cease and desist breast-feeding order for mb and dione). i have not done much with the planning.

mostly missing sue.

i think what i need this month is a few more massages, quality time with my hair-stylist and a few more work-outs to re-build my arms & back (MUSCLE MEMORY!)

this one is for ravi

2004-08-22T22:05:00.000-04:00

1:00 a.m. arrived at home, showered, went to bed
7:00 a.m. tossed & turned, decided to get up
8:00 a.m. ate cocoa krispies, went back to bed
9:30 a.m. woke up, took a shower
10:00 a.m. left for work
10:30 a.m. bought potting soil and lucky bamboo for the office
11:00 a.m. helped students find answers to the really serious questions of life (like why they didn't go to school of science & math)
1:00 p.m. re-potted two trees for the office hallway
2:00 p.m. ate broccoli-slaw, read my email
2:30 p.m. left work and stopped by a friends house--she wasn't home, left a message
3:00 p.m. arrived home with a backache
3:30 p.m. tico and i changed into our swimsuits & sat out on the deck to read
5:00 p.m. came inside, fell asleep in the tangerine dream
6:30 p.m. woke up, decided to make dinner
7:00 p.m. was interrupted by a phone call (ugh!)
8:00 p.m. returned to dinner-making and called my parents
9:00 p.m. finally ate dinner
10:00 p.m. another phone call
11:10 p.m. update the blog for ravi

etc. etc. etc.

the quad

2004-08-13T16:33:00.000-04:00

my life is regularly punctuated by hilarity and stupidity and charm from The Quad.
here is their own corner of bloggness... http://bubblegum.homeip.net/quadblog/

enjoy!
xoxo

and now, i interpret a dream...

2004-08-10T18:44:00.000-04:00

Peter Samuel wrote (and i provided comments):

Mark V's dream last nite :

It's the end of the world

Of course it is.. it was a "dark and stormy night"...

and Mark finds himself at Billy Graham's house but is reluctant to go in there

Because he HATES church and organized religion...

as he is being taken away by Chinese spies...

TELEPHONOMOTODOTAHHHH!!!!

Mark asks his wife and kids to go to his in-laws

So he can have the weekend to himself...

while he swears to stay and fight.

Right... fighting off a thousand Lucy Liu look-alikes is *really* hard!

He remembers firing 3 missiles at a house

HA!

when lo and behold , George W Bush appears at the doorway!!!

Caught! Just like Clinton!

(for hearing the rest of the dream , donate $9.99 to Keep-the-Back-Door-Open campaign)

I already paid at the church office...

The Quad wants to know what Mark has been smoking.

Everything...

Is it easier to dismiss these dreams as quirks of a deeply disturbed mind than consider the possibilty that Mark V maybe a prophet?

NO! He is a deeply disturbed prophet with a dreamy mind!!!

If any one in these lands will interpret mark's dream , he or she will be offered lifetime membership of the Quad.

No thanks... I'd rather take naps! :)

six degrees

2004-07-30T08:58:00.000-04:00

on wednesday, at the not-so-bright but very early hour of 5:30 a.m. i was headed to the airport for a flight to kalamazoo. the flight left on time and i arrived with 15 minutes to spare for a plane change in cincinnati, ohio. the fact that 15 minutes is now the norm for plane changes and transit times is utterly ridiculous but i somehow managed to bypass the slow and infantile and scurry to concourse c for my flight.

it was delayed... and delayed... and delayed.. and delayed.

it turns out that my northwest airlines ticket was contracted out to delta airlines who contracted it out to comair who handles the planes but not the crews for aca (the company who owns independence air). no one could find a flight crew for us! since aca happened to not have management in concourse c, there was also no one to answer questions for us either!

after a three-hour wait, i and the other 4 passengers decided to ask about meal vouchers. suddenly the desk attendant remembers there's another flight to kalamazoo leaving in (guess when??!!) 5 minutes from concourse a.

this time there's no avoiding the rush and the 5 of us begin to head over to concourse a. the quick young woman ran ahead to ask them to hold the plane while i and the 3 elderlies hurried along as fast as we could trot.

we reach the gate in the nick of time, only to hear the other passengers complaining because they had to wait 10 minutes for us.

i'm going to write a letter... or, rather, 4 letters.

i did arrive safely in kalamazoo... i'm crossing my fingers for the trip home!

tangerine dream

2004-07-27T08:58:00.000-04:00

I just completed painting the master bedroom. It was a 2-week project (ugh!).

The bedroom colors are: mesa sunrise and marmalade. Mesa sunrise is a darker orange, while marmalade is, well, the color of marmalade.

I painted 2 coats of mesa sunrise and then sponged on (by hand!) the marmalade.

Jeff thinks it looks like a tangerine dream.

first blog ever

2004-07-20T12:56:00.000-04:00

so.... (buttons!)
this is my first blog ever. tico and i decided that i needed to work on my fifty in a new way, instead of writing tons of emails and trying to keep up with all the email addy changes from everyone.

sounds like a lot of work, doesn't it!?

if you want to know why i'm a rallygirl, check out: www.linaracing.com